Stephanie: Oh how am I supposed to get any work done taking back our country when I'm continually pestered by the celebrity hotline, super hot movie stars calling me, like, for instance, could it be Viggo Mortensen, star of Lord of the Rings? He stole my heart. Viggo?
Stephanie: Oh god! Hi, Viggo how are you?
Viggo: I'm good. How are you today?
Stephanie: I'm good honey. Listen, I know saving the country is important, let's get to the important stuff first though...are you currently married?
Viggo: Uh, no [laughs]
Stephanie: Oh my god, alright, I'm just checking. I love your...
Viggo: How about you?
Stephanie: No, I'm not.
Stephanie: Thanks for asking.
[Viggo laughs in the background]
Stephanie: So now you wrote this piece that everybody's been talking about...about impeaching the President and I am with you. I am with you sir!
Viggo: Yeah, I mean, I think I'm only saying what a lot of people are starting to feel around the country, you know.
Stephanie: Well now you see I work here with two no-men that keep trying to say that we don't control the House and Senate, we can't do it, blah blah blah. And I like your positive energy. Tell me what you've been thinking and writing about.
Viggo: Well, I think that, you know, you just see the way the people have led the way, which is shameful for the government, in helping those in need on the Gulf coast in particular, and, you know, people are going to take care of business if the government can't or refuses to. And I think the same thing is going to happen in terms of this impeachment. I hope. I don't know, I mean, I think a lot more Americans now believe that there's something unusually wrong.
Stephanie: Well, listen, I read your piece and I thought it was powerful. First of all because I still have that fantasy about you in G.I. Jane, you know, barking orders, so I would do anything you say. I would do push-ups and start an impeachment trial.
Viggo: Well, that's good. No, I think that people should think for themselves but I just wanted to be honest about what I think...I mean, I've thought about our government and governments in general and I think governments do generally lie. It doesn't matter how nice or responsible the person in charge is, and I think we can always expect two-faced behaviour from, you know, most politicians.
Stephanie: Right well what you wrote....
Viggo: But I think that the arrogance and the irresponsible extent of the Bush administration's dishonesty has broken new ground in the area of bald-faced lying, don't you?
Stephanie: I do and I love what you wrote here "members of the Bush Administration responsible for the blatant lies and self-serving manipulations that have fanned the flames of disaster from Iraq to New Orleans must be prosecuted as our laws require. Please call or write your government representatives and help get the scoundrels out of government and into prison where they belong. Do not allow the subject to be changed, don't be distracted. The time to act is now. Take back your country."
Viggo: And I don't think they can change....they're trying, you know, obviously. I mean if you ask somebody right now 'What about that Karl Rove/Valerie Plame thing?' most Americans would say, even if they were aware of it at the time, would say 'What was that? What was that deal?' because they have erased that one from popular media. I mean, nobody's talking about that and they should, about that particular....
Stephanie: But that's because they keep doing more progessively awful things....
Viggo: Well that's true.
Stephanie: And it takes your eye off the last awful ball.
Viggo: But the thing is that this is here, and the images have been seen and even the most moderate and, in some cases, conservative newshounds and, you know, TV personalities and news have taken them to task. I think that, um, it's increasingly obvious that something's gotta change. I mean, and most people in the country I think are aware that there's a problem there, except, you know, among the most rabid, narrow-minded, Bush apologists.
Stephanie: Viggo thank you for speaking out and being a fine American. The fact that you are so hot is completely beside the point but please come in and bark orders at me some morning will you?
Viggo: Thank you so much for your show, I listen to it every day when I'm in L.A.
Stephanie: Oh god, that's a new fantasy. Thank you Viggo.
Stephanie: Viggo Mortensen. Oh! I'm going to need to take a quick shower!